Thursday, December 21, 2017

What Isaiah Thinks of Pharisee Phil and his Phony Conservative 'Christian' Friends

Speaking of Isaiah, have you ever read the book, Pharisee Phil…man of God…holy holy holy?  I just read it again and saw you and your friends all over the place in there and it ain’t pretty. 

Pharisee Phil supports conservative rulers who loudly proclaim themselves Christians but are liars who do the opposite of the LORD’s commands: self-righteous phonies who claim that cutting health care, housing, food and services for the poor like Jesus, hungry and needy children, our veterans and the disabled to provide more money for the mammon worshiping millionaires are Christian works.   That lie is BACKWARDS.
“Ah sinful nation, a people laden with iniquity, a seed of evildoers, children that are corrupters: they have forsaken the Lord, they have provoked the Holy One of Israel unto anger, they are gone away backward.” Isaiah  1:4
Pharisee Phil…man of God…holy holy holy…highly reveres the pagan holidays of Christmas and Easter and publicly praises evil men for their vain reverence of those ‘sacred’ days, and presses on celebrating them despite the fact that doing so makes God nauseous and is in blatant disregard of God’s word through Isaiah.
“Your new moons and your appointed feasts my soul hateth: they are a trouble unto me; I am weary to bear them.” Isaiah 1:14
Pharisee Phil…man of God…holy holy holy…prays for I know not what.  First he expresses support for the Trump administration but then turns around five minutes later and says he disagrees with everything they are doing.  If a man of God…holy holy holy…disagrees with everything some people are doing, then they must be doing evil, and yet recognizing that Pharisee Phil still supports them?  I don’t understand that but I do see where God clearly expresses his answer to Pharisee Phil’s prayers for bloody ‘God Bless Amerikkka’ through Isaiah. 
“And when ye spread forth your hands, I will hide mine eyes from you: yea, when ye make many prayers, I will not hear: your hands are full of blood.
Wash you, make you clean; put away the evil of your doings from before mine eyes; cease to do evil;
Learn to do well; seek judgment, relieve the oppressed, judge the fatherless, plead for the widow.”  Isaiah 1: 15-17
And yet Pharisee Phil supports the conservative rulers who make us a bloody nation, who proudly wear their evil on their sleeves and rub them in God’s face; the rulers who pervert judgment, oppress the poor like Jesus, and who steal from orphans, other needy children and widows to silver line their coffers (and eternal coffins).
One of the things Isaiah would certainly find most contemptible about Pharisee Phil is that he was an orphan.  When my mother was a little girl she started telling my grandparents that she wanted a brother so when Pharisee Phil was five or six my grandparents welcomed him and his three siblings (along with another aunt of mine) into their home and raised them in conjunction with New York City foster care services.  This, of course, required financial assistance from the government (which similar government assistance was required when my grandmother herself was orphaned as a baby) so one would think Pharisee Phil would be passionate about providing those services for the many orphans like himself and the mother who took him in and who will always be with us, and yet for whatever bizarre reason Pharisee Phil aligns himself with evil rulers like Paul Ryan, another who was less fortunate as a child and relied heavily on government programs for sustenance in his childhood and for his education and who now thinks nothing of pulling the rug from under those with the identical needs who came after him.  Ryan is the poster child for shameless hypocrite, and yet similarly, Pharisee Phil supports the Paul Ryans who take money from orphans and feed it to the evil rich (who in truth are destitute).
“Thy princes are rebellious, and companions of thieves: every one loveth gifts, and followeth after rewards: they judge not the FATHERLESS, neither doth the cause of the widow come unto them.”  Isaiah 1:23
Pharisee Phil’s evil conservative rulers hate poor people like Jesus and are constantly squeezing every possible penny from them—the latest is 850 billion in cuts to Medicaid services along with depriving 23 million people of affordable health care—and Isaiah clearly expresses God’s contempt and disgust.
“…ye have eaten up the vineyard; the spoil of the poor is in your houses.
 What mean ye that ye beat my people to pieces, and grind the faces of the poor? saith the Lord God of hosts.”  Isaiah 3:14-15
Pharisee Phil wears this absolutely hideous, gaudy, jewel encrusted gold mafioso thug life bada pinky ring that I’ve always thought was grotesque and very unbecoming of a man of God…holy holy holy…and worn in spite of God’s clearly expressed derision of such trifling vanities.
“In that day the Lord will take away the bravery of their tinkling ornaments about their feet, and their cauls, and their round tires like the moon,
The chains, and the bracelets, and the mufflers,
The bonnets, and the ornaments of the legs, and the headbands, and the tablets, and the earrings,
The rings, and nose jewels,
The changeable suits of apparel, and the mantles, and the wimples, and the crisping pins,
 The glasses, and the fine linen, and the hoods, and the vails.” Isaiah 3:18-23
And inasmuch as ‘covetousness is idolatry’, if God does indeed view Pharisee’s Phil’s bodacious bada jewel encrusted gold ring as an idol, then Isaiah speaks to that too.
 In that day a man shall cast his idols of silver, and his idols of gold, which they made each one for himself to worship, to the moles and to the bats.”  Isaiah 2:20
And look here in Isaiah where we find Pharisee Phil and the phony Christians who claim to glorify the Lord by doing the opposite of his commands.
“And he said, Go, and tell this people, Hear ye indeed, but understand not; and see ye indeed, but perceive not.
 Make the heart of this people fat, and make their ears heavy, and shut their eyes; lest they see with their eyes, and hear with their ears, and understand with their heart, and convert, and be healed.”  Isaiah 6:9-10
After the eloquent prophecies about the virgin birth and coming of the Lord in chapter 7, Isaiah goes on to describe Jesus and His government in chapter 9.
 For unto us a child is born, unto us a son is given: and the government shall be upon his shoulder: and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, The mighty God, The everlasting Father, The Prince of Peace.
 Of the increase of his government and peace there shall be no end, upon the throne of David, and upon his kingdom, to order it, and to establish it with judgment and with justice from henceforth even forever.” Isaiah 9:16-17
We are shown a very clear example of how Christ taught the apostles and disciples to govern themselves in Acts of the Apostles.
“And all that believed were together, and had all things common;
And sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need.” Acts 2:44-45
The Jesus government is also known as ‘socialism,’ which conservatives hate to their own destruction—at least according to Isaiah.  The reason Pharisee Phil’s fellow conservatives at Fox DESPISE socialism is because they are evil and socialism is good.
 Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!”  Isaiah 5:20
And the next three verses conveniently describe the phony Christian conservative politicians and lobbyists exchanging bribes on the cocktail circuit while turning America into a 21st century Sodom—320 million strong and growing.
 Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight!
 Woe unto them that are mighty to drink wine, and men of strength to mingle strong drink:
Which justify the wicked for reward, and take away the righteousness of the righteous from him!” Isaiah 5: 21-24
And look here, where God speaks through Isaiah yet again about the poor like Jesus, the needy, and specifically ORPHANS!  It is obviously really important to Him yet somehow Pharisee Phil empowers the despicable rulers who ROB orphans.  How will you explain that ugly part of your hardened heart to God, Pharisee Phil?
“Woe unto them that decree unrighteous decrees, and that write grievousness which they have prescribed;
To turn aside the needy from judgment, and to take away the right from the poor of my people, that widows may be their prey, and that they may rob the FATHERLESS!”  Isaiah 10: 1-2
Pharisee Phil’s fellow conservatives and the phony Christians at Fox that Pharisee Phil praises also hate liberals.  And yet Isaiah plainly states that liberals are good and churls (an antiquated word that perfectly describes conservatives) are evil.
“The vile person shall be no more called liberal, nor the churl said to be bountiful.
For the vile person will speak villainy, and his heart will work iniquity, to practice hypocrisy, and to utter error against the Lord, to make empty the soul of the hungry, and he will cause the drink of the thirsty to fail.
 The instruments also of the churl are evil: he deviseth wicked devices to destroy the poor with lying words, even when the needy speaketh right.
 But the liberal deviseth liberal things; and by liberal things shall he stand.” Isaiah 32: 5-8
Jesus is the most liberal man who ever lived—He healed them all and fed them all before laying his life down for his friends.  Liberal works like those of Jesus are described in detail later in Isaiah.
“Is not this the fast that I have chosen? to loose the bands of wickedness, to undo the heavy burdens, and to let the oppressed go free, and that ye break every yoke?
 Is it not to deal thy bread to the hungry, and that thou bring the poor that are cast out to thy house? when thou seest the naked, that thou cover him; and that thou hide not thyself from thine own flesh?
Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the Lord shall be thy reward.”  Isaiah 58:6-8
But God and Jesus see right through whited sepulcher phony conservatives, as we know from this verse from Isaiah, which was so important to Jesus that He incorporated it into the gospel.
“Wherefore the Lord said, Forasmuch as this people draw near me with their mouth, and with their lips do honor me, but have removed their heart far from me, and their fear toward me is taught by the precept of men.”  Isaiah 29:13.
So how will you explain your part in denying orphans who followed you the same blessing that saved your life, Pharisee Phil?  What words will you use to tell God that it was righteous to deprive orphans of what is their right in order to feed millionaires and billionaires money they’ll never spend?  I imagine you’ll do a lot of stammering. 
Isaiah is absolutely LOADED with denunciations of phony conservative Christians.  Would you like me to use the 'sharp sword' to whip up parts 2, 3 and 4?

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

The Thug Life Unicorn Posse

The Thug Life Unicorn Posse is a 90 minute horror/comedy written in the same spirit as the brilliant British film Shaun of the Dead.  The script was inspired by a version of this tattoo.

LOGLINE:  Bloodthirsty, beer guzzling unicorns terrorize the town of Chester.  

One stormy night at the zoo a depressed rhinoceros is freed from his pen by a mighty lightning bolt from heaven.  While enjoying his newfound liberty the rhino wanders through town to a horse racing track, where he enters the stable and mounts the fillies.

A few months later very colorful unicorns start to appear around town.  They are about the size of goats and extremely agile.  Several wander to a bar one night and drink some beer out of half empty bottles stacked in boxes behind the bar.  The unicorns very much enjoy being drunk, and in their search for more beer they look through the window and into the bar.  It is closing time and two drunks with extremely distended beer bellies stagger toward the rear exit.  When they come outside they are promptly gored by the unicorns, who feast on the beer and blood that gushes from their bellies.  This is the moment when unicorns also discover their unquenchable thirst for blood.

Word goes out like wildfire, and after a hunter and his son are gored in the woods the town hurriedly evacuates in fear.  There is an overhead shot of the traffic lined up to leave Chester; the viewer also sees a few odd cars trickling into town.  Daring people are flocking to Chester hoping to trap a unicorn for a variety of reasons: as a gift to a daughter; for sale to mysterious Asian buyers; to capture one for a trophy, either whole or the head or even just the horn; and for use as an aphrodisiac when lovers drink from the inverted horn.  

They all stay at the Chester Inn, where the psychotic innkeeper lives with his two daughters.  The innkeeper rules his hotel with an iron fist that instills fear and respect in most of his guests; then the innkeeper quickly becomes caught up in the hunt himself.  More characters are gored in very unicorny ways while several of the shallowest romances ever (to aspire) to grace the screen play out.  

Charlie, the bartender of the place where the unicorns first discovered their love of beer and blood befriends the little critters with cherry lambic beer and cow's blood.  While the unicorn hunters are getting killed by unicorns, and humiliated by the psycho innkeeper, Charlie hires carpenters to expand his bar into a tourist trap:  Charlie's Brew BQ and Unicornutopia.  

Charlie saves the day for the few surviving characters and the film has a happy ending that invites a sequel.  

Here are the first few pages of the script....

The Thug Life Unicorn Posse
A film by Robert Charest


A rhinoceros lies in his mud bath looking dejected and depressed.  It is raining and the audience cannot discern if the droplets running from his eyes are raindrops or tears.  As he lies there the rain intensifies.  There is a crash of thunder followed by a mighty lightning bolt that smashes the rhinoceros’ pen, leaving a gash of rubble in the concrete wall.  The rhino gets up, ambles over and inspects the heavily damaged concrete wall, then begins to dislodge and remove the freshly broken stones with his horn.  He then moves alongside the wall and smashes it with his backside, eventually picking and bashing his way to freedom. 
Show a collection of scenes of the rhinoceros: outside the zoo looking back through the rain…then walking down the road…wandering through some backyards…and across a field…and alongside a river…all in the rain.
The rhinoceros wanders out of some trees and onto a horse track.  He roams to the middle of the racing oval and gazes about the place.  Then his eyes light on the stable in the distance and he rumbles toward it.
The rhinoceros enters.  Several fillies are in their stalls.  Some are standing with their heads out and some with their tails out.  The rhino scrutinizes and licks one’s face then sees a tail sticking from the next stall and turns his attention to it.  He sniffs it then lifts the tail with his horn.
Several mares are lying on their sides giving birth to baby unicorns.  The unicorns are various colors—white, orange, red and purple.  They can be mottled or plain and have rainbow colored horns.  Make them so cute that everyone will want a stuffed one for Christmas.
Six unicorns are frolicking in a flowery field.  They stand a little more than waist high to an average male human.  I envision them being as agile as rock and tree climbing goats and just slightly larger.  The unicorns run over and play in some nearby trees then disappear into the woods. 
Background music is playing and about twenty patrons are hanging around a pool table and at the bar drinking bottles of beer.  Show at least seven or eight distinctly large beer bellies.  Also show particular focus shots on CHARLIE the bartender and EARL the hunter.  Then show two unicorns furtively looking in through the window.
The two unicorns come around the corner and lift their noses to the enticing scent of beer.  They track it to a stack of several cases of empty beer bottles and start sniffing excitedly.  One uses its horn to open the top box and they pick out two half full bottles with their teeth.  They lift them into the air and suck out every drop.  They leap around then start licking the bottles and using their teeth to lift more bottles straight up into the air to empty the remnants down their throats. 
The unicorns are quite inebriated and leaping around in a mess of bottles and shredded boxes.  They each spear an empty beer bottle onto their horns and smash them in a play sword fight.  They are having a drunken blast.  They smash several bottles in this manner and snicker and giggle with broken glass everywhere.  Charlie the bartender comes out with a bag of trash and sees the unicorns standing in the mess.
What the holy crap!
The unicorns hop and run into the trees behind the bar.
Charlie re enters from the rear.  His expression belies his deep shock.  Earl is sitting at the end of the bar.
I don’t believe what I just saw!
You do look spooked.  Did you see a vampire sinking fangs into a werewolf?
Not quite but you’re not far off!  I think I just saw two unicorns!
You need to stop drinking the gin.  The elderberries are scrambling your brains and your eyesight.
Perhaps, but there is a large mess of broken beer bottles out back and I just walked out to see two very colorful waist high horse like creatures picking up empty beer bottles with the horns protruding from their foreheads and smashing them as if they were play sword fighting.
EARL (stands up)
I’m going hunting later this morning and want to get a couple hours of sleep beforehand.  I’ll see you tomorrow. 
Keep an eye out for unicorns.  Their horns look dangerous but if you were able to bag one I’m sure the horn would be worth a fortune.
I’ll keep that in mind if you keep this in mind: beware the elderberries.  Good night, Charlie.
Earl has a can of beer in his hand and is quietly picking his way through the trees with his rifle at the ready.  The hunter spies several unicorns. 
Oh my God!  Charlie was right!
Earl aims the rifle and fires.  He hits a unicorn, who bleeds and drops.  Earl rushes from hiding to inspect the kill.  As Earl reaches what he supposes to be a carcass, one of the other unicorns appears and gently touches his horn to the bullet hole in the wounded unicorn’s breast.  The wound magically heals.  The healed unicorn stands up and with several others that appear they surround Earl, who is terrified.  The one he shot is particularly angry, and fierce, and charges at Earl and gores his beer belly.  Earl crashes to the ground and the unicorns immediately start feasting on the beer and blood that is gushing from his mountainous stomach.  One of the unicorns grasps Earl’s half finished can of beer in his lips and tips it up.  He then rejoins the feeding frenzy.  


Monday, June 12, 2017



Robert Charest
5514 13th Ave S
Gulfport, FL 33707
(727) 310-1928


BA in English and Music
Honors College with Departmental Honors awarded
Southern Connecticut State University
New Haven, Connecticut


-- I worked during and after high school and college in Durham and New Haven, Connecticut, in bars and restaurants including Time Out Tavern, The Greenery, The Yale Graduate’s Club and Archie Moore’s.

-- In 1994 I moved to New Orleans, where I tended bar and served at Houlihans on Bourbon Street.

-- In 1995 I moved to Austin, Texas, where I tended bar and served at The Tavern, Air Conditioned, from March of 1996 until May of 1997.

-- In 1997 I moved back to Connecticut, where I tended bar and served at Cornerstones in Middletown, Connecticut from August 1997 until August 1998.

-- In 2000 I began working for Brinker Restaurants.  I served and tended bar at On The Border in Rocky Hill, Connecticut from March of 2000 until March 2003, when I transferred to On The Border in Orange, Connecticut.

-- In October 2003 I moved to Florida, and transferred within Brinker Restaurants to Chili’s in Largo, Florida.

-- From 2004 through 2010 I worked at a couple of places in and around St. Pete Beach, including Shell's and Sam Seltzer's Steakhouse.

-- From December 2008 until Mother's Day 2012, and again in the spring of 2015, I tended bar and served during the winter season at Carino’s Italian CaffĂ©, a fine dining restaurant on St. Pete Beach.  At Carino's I was also responsible for liquor and wine inventory, as well as general front of the house duties.   I am still welcome to return to work there any time.

-- In 2010 I started at Mama Leone's on Hampton Beach, New Hampshire.  Mama Leone's was a casual high volume Italian beach restaurant where I served tables and tended bar.  They were open from mid May till Columbus Day weekend.   I worked there for eight seasons, concluding my run when the restaurant permanently closed after the 2017 season.

-- In 2013 and 2014 I worked the winter season at The Lobster Pot in Redington Shores.  A few weeks after I had been invited back to work the 2015 season the restaurant permanently closed.


Connie Peddle was the manager who hired me at Carino's in 2008.  We are still friends.  She can be reached at (727) 519-8833

Danielle Kooyoomjian was a manager and co-worker at Mama Leone’s.  We are still friends.  She can be reached at (603) 394-5036 

Alisia Nicholson was the manager who hired me at the Lobster Pot.  We are still friends.  She can be reached at (727) 768 1665

I can furnish additional references upon request.


Speaking about myself in the restaurant workplace, I don’t drink or smoke, I am always professional and punctual and I haven’t missed a shift since 2012, and even then I was literally unable to rise from bed.  I have worked in six different states and have experience ranging from neighborhood sports tavern to several years of fine dining.  I am equally adept on the floor and behind the bar and excellent with big parties. If you hire me I put myself at your disposal and am willing to work six and seven days throughout season.

In the restaurant I am very big on team work and treating my co-workers with mutual respect.  I am very polite and friendly to everyone and full of ‘please’ and ‘thank yous’ when interacting with coworkers.  Since I could never work in a kitchen or as a host, I have especial respect for they who do jobs I could not, and whose jobs are necessary to me doing mine and having one in the first place.  I am hardwired to be in a good mood every day, and since we are in the hospitality business I like to keep the atmosphere light and drama free.  I am quick witted and entertaining to have around; I have a sharp tongue and definitely generate some laughter.  I have an excellent memory and like to get to know my guests by their first names, especially the regulars.  I am friendly, interesting, funny and provide excellent service, and over time I get a lot of guests coming in requesting my section in every restaurant I’ve worked in.  That's not braggadocio it's simply the truth.  At Mama Leone's I had more call parties request me than the rest of the staff combined.  Here is a list of them.

Norm and Gloria, Bob and Melissa, Sonny, Rob and Carol, Rob and Lynne, Rob’s son Brent and his wife Kate, Chris and his wife, Warren and Alisia, and their friends Ken and his girlfriend and Warren’s other friend Mike and his girlfriend Pam, Dave and Shirley (hoteliers who came in and requested me almost once a week for eight years), Terry, Donna and their daughter Marisa, Ken and Donna, Rob from Enfield and his wife and their kids Will and Grace.  
Nancy Billy and Deb, Debbie and Brian. Debbie also organized Girls Night Out the first weekend every August.  That was when 12-15 of her girlfriends came in for drinks and dinner and requested me.  A guy named Kevin brought his twelve top family in twice a summer and requested me, Rick and Joanie, Mike from New Smyrna Beach, and many others I only knew by face.  The same has happened at other restaurants where I worked any length of time.

I once saved a manager's life at 6:30 during dinner service on a Sunday night.  He had a massive heart attack and collapsed just inside the front door.  His face turned grey and purple and was foaming.  I did chest compressions while a retired cop who was dining there performed respiratory for four eternal minutes until paramedics arrived.  I also speak decent Spanish and write novels which are described on my website: